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Why I'm proud of Jay-Z

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Life in a Shanty Town

November 5 · Issue #353 · View online

The hip-hop newsletter that's not afraid to ask the tough questions


Internets,
Of all the accolades Jay-Z has received over the course of his illustrious career, his induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame means the most to me personally, because it comes from outside the community and therefore is more valuable.
If hip-hop had its own hall of fame, started by the few older rappers who haven’t already died from substance abuse and/or type 2 diabetes, it wouldn’t matter as much, because anyone can say that they’re great, and what difference does it make?
Hip-hop is lousy with songs in which guys talk about how good they are at rapping or how much money they have, and I’ve just about grown tired of it.
Receiving an accolade from a group of older white people is more impressive to me, because the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame won’t acknowledge just anyone.
LL Cool J has been eligible for like 20 years now, and they just now let him in. And even then, I heard someone had to make a few phone calls and get him in on a technicality. Older CACs weren’t about to vote for LL—and he’s LL!
Is LL not on one of these TV shows where the police investigate weird sex crimes? Does the audience for such shows no longer consist primarily of older white people? I know they found fewer older white people in the last census, leading to concerns that white people are being “replaced.”
I’d be curious to know what it was about LL that was so unworthy. Is it the way he looks without a hat on? Did he do a few too many soft R&B records after he had that one song with Boyz II Men? Maybe the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame actually has standards.
If it’s the latter, I wouldn’t necessarily be against that. Funcrusher Plus turns 25 next year, and it would be nice to see Company Flow receive some some long overdue recognition. They’ve even got a white guy in the group.
Jay-Z made more bad songs than LL Cool J overall, if not percentagewise, and he’s starting to look like an ugly woman in his old age, with his goofy faux-Basquiat hairdo, but I guess the hall of fame was able to look past that?
It might help that Jay-Z is rumored to be a member of the Illuminati, and I would imagine that the Illuminati has a certain influence over the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, given that it’s run, in part, by top record label execs.
Whatever Jay-Z did to secure his membership (hopefully it wasn’t anything gay) seems to have come in handy this past weekend. How else to explain the fact that Jay-Z was inducted on the same day as LL, and the first LL album came out in 1985?
Regardless, I extend a hearty congratulations to Jay-Z. He’s more deserving of recognition than all but a very small handful of rap artists, and this proves it once and for all.
Take it easy on yourself,
Bol

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