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I've got some bad news for Kanye

Internets, When I saw that video of Kanye walking underneath some train tracks, addressing things tha
I've got some bad news for Kanye
By Byron Crawford • Issue #74 • View online
Internets,
When I saw that video of Kanye walking underneath some train tracks, addressing things that didn’t sit quite right with his spirit, as one does, I’m sure I was thinking the same thing everyone else was thinking.
Namely, that if Kanye was going to address everyone who’s had sex with his wife, or is rumored to have had sex with his wife, he’d be out there for quite some time. Eventually, the sun would go down. He might have to dip into one of those gross chicken restaurants.
He’s upset, he says, because there’s a rumor going around that Drake once banged Kim Kardashian, and Drake hasn’t done anything to refute said rumor, either because it’s true or because he could give a rat’s ass. He’s upset with Kanye because he suspects that Kanye told Pusha T that he was hiding a child, thus providing Pusha T with fodder for the vicious “The Story of Adidon.”
Did Drake really have his own line of Adidas named after his baby with a French hoo-er that was canceled when word got out? You can never know what to believe these days. The rumor that he banged Kanye’s wife doesn’t seem to be based on anything other than the fact that “Kiki,” from the ubiquitous “In My Feelings,” sorta kinda sounds like a nickname for Kim.
(Recall that Kanye once got upset with Wiz Khalifa for writing a song about KK, which apparently is a type of weed, but maybe also because he’s jealous of Wiz’s long, lean physique. I’m sure he could give a rat’s ass about the fact that Wiz has a sus baby with his ex Amber Rose.)
We do know that Drake seems to dis Kanye’s weird-looking shoes (the ultimate in disrespect) on some song he did with French Montana, maybe for no reason other than to dis Kanye. (Wasn’t French with a Kardashian at one point? It’s hard to keep track.) And I think I read somewhere that he’s been wearing Nikes, which would lend credence to the theory that his deal with Adidas has been canceled.
I’m actually more concerned with the state of Kanye’s marriage. Could it be that he’s finally gone off his meds long enough to realize that he’s married to someone who once did a pr0n film with Ray J? Talk about a moment of clarity!
He’s claiming to have moved back to the Chi, as part of a larger PR campaign to repair his image with people who decided they were done with him after he declared that slavery was a choice. But I wonder if that’s even necessary. If these people were fans of his music in the first place, they can’t be especially sophisticated thinkers.
It was announced the other day that his song “I Love It” has become his first hit single since forever. I’m not even sure how long. I know the fact that radio didn’t play any of the songs from The Life of Pablo, other than that Desiigner song, was one of the things he complained about in that interview he did with Charlamagne Tha God. They didn’t play shit from the Wyoming album either.
Supposedly, he’s working on a new album in Chicago, and an album with Chance the Rapper. Or are those two one in the same? At any rate, he seems to have had the same idea as Nas, who’s since distanced himself from his own Wyoming album. Kim Kardashian, meanwhile, says she’s “not worried” about Kanye saying he’s moving back to Chicago, nor is she moving there herself. He’s always coming up with cockamamie idea, she says.
I’ll say!
Between that and Kanye’s video complaining about people mentioning his wife in interviews, it doesn’t sound like their marriage is doing well. In fact, it’s probably for the best that Kanye is in the Chi for the time being. Imagine having to go home to her after walking around complaining about how many guys have fucked her.
It’d be hard to give her a kiss, knowing where her mouth has been.
Take it easy on yourself,
Bol

P.S.
I wrote the book on Kanye, his marriage and what have you, and a book on people who aren’t as famous, whose lives, nevertheless, are just as messy, if not more so. Purchase as many copies as you can. I’m desperate!
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Byron Crawford

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